I have not followed the elections this time around as usual. The news articles on who won, who lost and who is appointed as a Chief Minister in all these states. A friend ( Suhas)follows all election results with devotion. When I say devotion what it means is,staying in front of the TV flipping news channel after news channel. If it takes a leave from work for this, he shall do that or more. in my case, I stay a little far from all of this. I know I can get charged up and gets really fiery if I participate in these things.
But, see now that I am in a law school where all the students are studying law, they write emails freely airing their opinion on politics, policies and everything related to governance. Somehow these would-be lawyers from this elite school have this sense of know it all from reading news papers, sometimes its so apparent to someone like me how off they are on their understanding of realities.
I sought an exposure to social sciences as I felt my understanding of grassroot work from work is no more enough. If the work has to be lasting and be done at scale, I needed a different knowledge base. Its been a rewarding experience with social sciences.
But sometimes I wonder why did I set out to study public policy. There are not many instances of this, but there definitely are some instances when I feel strongly and ask myself ” Why did I call upon myself this course?”. I am writing this post while I go through an email chain with comments from the students airing their opinion on the newly designated Chief Minister of Uttar Pradesh. The comments on him are so negative. I am not saying that person is a favorable one for the post. His past records have no reason for anyone to believe that he will be a “good” man.
I was talking to a friend here about giving a chance to this new CM of Uttar Pradesh and ended up having a heated argument. When we stretch it further and breath governance and politics day in and out, it leaves one really polarized. It leaves one really cynical, bitter, enraged. Why do we study all forms of social sciences, is it not to understand the society better, is it not to address the issues in the society better, is it not to make some progress ?
When we read, form opinions and discuss things as a social science person, I feel fatigued in the process, let alone contribute to anything positive. I started out as an engineer in awe of people from social sciences, now I feel I was better of having my head in the ground working on solutions without really spending all my mind in understanding the “social fabric”, “political context” and yada yada yada….
I know we human beings are not objective beings, we are mostly formed by the things we are exposed to, by the things we see, we learn, we read. But why does the thoughts and all things of my mind become so big and so important compared that we begin to harbor such ill feeling of rage, anger, of superiority that we forget the larger scheme of things and much important fact that this time on earth is not for ever. Why can the discourses come from a place of respect of acceptance of the other view. I know its so easy to speak stuff like it, because when someone disagrees with me with condesension, I only stoop lower by trying to trivialize that point of view.
I want to go back to being a engineer, may be a positive policy engineer or a happy society engineer. May sound naive, but its such a beautiful place when everyone sports a smile on face and try to work on hard issues but still smile and be hopeful. Smile , be the smile engineer. Lets all try and be the smile engineer.